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Well lately I've been socializing with a crazy variety of people of different ages and personalities....and I've got a lot of time these days to think (mostly at night or at work) and I've had some interesting thoughts. Like....
You know what? People are amazingly simple. You give them what they want, either food, entertainment, or fun, and they like you. You don't laugh at their jokes, make them feel good, or give them stuff and then they lose interest. Its. So. Stupid! HAhaha.....but who am I to say so? I bet we're all the same.
Also, I've noticed that there are two kinds of people, those that live within their dreams and their own imaginations, and those that constantly take on the real world and live outside of their heads. I've noticed that those that live inside their heads tend to be less realistic but they have more interesting ideas. Those that live outside of their heads tend to be more realistic, but rely more on tales of their adventures than abstract thoughts when you talk to them. Meh...I could be wrong about this, the boundaries between the two types aren't always well defined but you can see that most people lean towards one type over the other.
Does anyone remember a cartoon called sheera warrior princess? They were demo-ing it on the TVs in HMV. *shivers*
Negativity and laziness will get you nowhere. I mean, a lot of people probably know this, but its so true! If you're at least trying to improve your situation, whether it be trying to make money, learn a language, improve your grades, you'll probably make some progress at least. And I mean really trying.
If someone is really upset or unmotivated, or in a bad state of some sort, if you help them you practically have to break your own soul to cheer them up or turn them around, if you can at all. In other words its hard to be postive and strong in the face of so much negativity and pain. Sigh..... people never realize what they put their loved ones through....
If you work really hard, your employer may like you more, but don't expect any reward for your effort.
Motivation, enthusiasm, humor, friends,and looking forward to good times just makes the bad parts of life so much more bearable.
Any kind of love takes effort, but if your effort is returned, then they really care about you!
I love the atmosphere of night, tonight it was raining slightly and it was really dark. There was a cool breeze, and it felt so cool to be doing something so ordinary like sitting on a wall outside the library waiting for the bus.
the world loves witty charismatic people that aren't afraid to do stupid things in public. Ha. (thinks of the class clowns in highschool)
and most of what I have just said is probably common obvious knowledge, someone once told me that I'm facinated by everything and I guess its true. But yeah, there goes my atempt at being insightful and wise..
Ps What the hell has university done to me? I used to think that I thought enough, these days I can't stop thinking! Gah! I want to turn off my brain for a day.....maybe I need to sleep....arghh....I hope nobody reads this anymore.
myuubee · Thu Jul 27, 2006 @ 05:07am · 0 Comments |
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Summer has been ok. I'm working a lot these days so I haven't had much free time. crying But I'm ok!!! ARghhhhh.....
Watercolor
Colors blur together like a watercolored stream Illusions grab hold the edges of reality Elements woven together in mind, brightened by pigments Meticulous placement, echoing the effort of nature If it is not real is it fake? If it does not exist can it still be called beautiful? Questions. Always. blurring truth Smudges, drips, tears, faded irregular circles interrupt perfect shape The world recedes into its resting place in the mind As most things are, lost more easily than kept Silent and neglected dreams welling up Pushed below, to stay afloat carried along by invisible streams absent moments. The artist finds a dusty brush, a lifeless tool empty of the force that caused it to dance haunted by vapors of a soul doused beneath the surface.
myuubee · Wed Jul 26, 2006 @ 05:53am · 0 Comments |
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Aww.....it seems like many of my mayfield friends are having a hard time right now, judging from what I've heard them say. I'd just like to say that if you guys ever need anything, you can always ask me. 3nodding
Actually, I am seriously considering planning a karaoke trip to pacific mall(cuz they have karaoke booths.) I've done this once before and it was really fun, so I' d like to do it again. I'm still working everything out in my head, but I want to do it maybe next weekend or the one after. Then maybe people can have some fun and forget their worries for a bit. I will invite a lot of people, but you guys have to at least attempt to sing if you come! scream That's the whole point of the trip! Haha....Oh yes, by the way, I never plan parties. I hate the planning part of things, and I did it a lot in highschool but it kinda frustrated me. I'm the kind of person who is always worried about everything going right and making sure everyone has fun. (I know, maybe I take things a bit too seriously sometimes) rolleyes So it's been awhile, but I was good at it, and I'd like to try it again. It'll be fun! So that's one thing on my mind.
My mom showed me how to do income tax yesterday...wow...confusing. eek I made an appointment with my university for career/academic advising....cuz I don't know what I want to major in, and that's a big problem. Actually, I had a dream last night that I failed psychology.......arghhh....I know that exam went badly, but I couldn't have failed the course. Arghh....despite my whining, I actually get pretty good marks. haha... xd
Beautiful day.....sigh...seems like finally the worst of my troubles are ending.... 3nodding
Anime north e-mailed me back! They recieved my music video!! YAYYYY!!! heart heart heart Please watch it at the con everyone! It's called "always searching for you" and is to Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle.
hahah.....looking forward to north, looking forward to the: j-pop dance fleamarket and music video competition and of course the dealers room
see you all there! xd
myuubee · Wed Apr 19, 2006 @ 07:06pm · 0 Comments |
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ow my eyeballs are burning! Too much time on the computer tonight! Hmmm...tomorrow is my brother's b-day, he'll turning 12, go him. But he has to stop growing or else he'll be the tallest person in my entire extended family!!! eek
I've been thinking too much lately, the topics usually being, what I have to get done, guys, random observations, what my major should be in university, memories, etc...
I have a wishlist a mile long, it only keeps growing and I can't stop thinking about everything! But I have most of the cheap stuff so of course my wishlist is all expensive stuff that I cannot afford. I can afford some of it after I save up money from working, but not all. Sigh...
Went to my cousin's house today for an easter celebration, it was ok, we played street hockey like we always do. (My cousin's are all male and all crazy.)
I've noticed that lately I'm becoming uncomfortable in most places I go and with most people. I don't feel normal or relaxed, only with very few people and definitely not in my own house. Consider yourself lucky if you are one of the few I can relax around but I won't name who you are in fear of excluding any aquaintances.
Porcupine tree is an interesting band, check them out! I recommend the song lazarus.
School is over, but the stress still lingers. Sigh.....make it go away.....I really need to have some fun.
I dunno, something happened to me this year, its internal, I can feel it. My optimism has certainly decreased and my energeticness. So I'm hoping that something will fix this, either sleep, or relaxation, or having fun every day, or summer weather, there are many things that I'm sure would help. Like I keep saying to everyone, this year kinda killed my soul. And it's only partially because I switched to university. There have been other things. I feel like I certainly have a lot to worry about, its a bit overwhelming, yes, but what can you do?
I hope people don't feel too concerned from reading this, this year has been probably the worst year, at least it feels that way. So I'm sure things will be better now that I'm off. We will see, and I'll continue to try and keep an open mind and not to think too much. 3nodding
myuubee · Sat Apr 15, 2006 @ 07:24am · 2 Comments |
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myuubee · Tue Mar 21, 2006 @ 11:46pm · 1 Comments |
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myuubee · Tue Mar 21, 2006 @ 11:18pm · 1 Comments |
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Well Im tired. Yawnnn.....must participate in a psych study shortly....last of the 3...I feel like a guinea pig. I want to watch harry potter the 4#!! It's out!! biggrin Oh and I desperately lack gold so it seems. crying Anyways, I miss the mayfield crew as always and I'm really looking forwad to anime north but I'm not sure I'll get my music video done in time!! crying I'll try my best but I have lots of homework. Plus the fact that I go crazy if I sit on my a** for long periods of time. I believe its called being restless...yes, you think? HAHahaha...Well today is very rainy. Makes me not want to move, grey skies and rainy days.....yawn....
myuubee · Thu Mar 09, 2006 @ 08:10pm · 0 Comments |
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Things have been pretty rough for me lately actually. I have no money and really need a job (still searching/applying) and my grandma's death is still on everyone in our family's mind. Sigh...I'm still not recovering from that yet. Not to mention that march will be a busy month since its the last month before the exams and near the end of the year, they've already started piling on the work. Wish I could have more time to enjoy my free time...I want to finish my music video this month as well. (I think I'll just have to lock myself in the computer room and study/edit footage for the entire month....yeah right..I can't do that.) I should really be in bed right now. Damn...tomorrow I have to write a 1500 word essay from scratch....and finish studying for psychology......Blah. So I'm complaining. I hate complaining....it drags other people's spirits down and that isn't what anyone needs. So read this and weep. Or not. Just felt like using that expression. Please ignore the angst, my troubles will pass, just like they always do. wink
tears
restless stagnation of an inactive soul all that is past is broken, struggling towards shapeless shadows release all holds, slow descent, frozen in the void, unable to explain nauseating flesh filled with aches and a frame shuddering pulse brief flickers of light, accusing laughter and short bursts of warmth cannot clear this world from quiet vibration that proves the undercurrent of icy acid failed flight, failed struggle, a short float, then silent drowning and no one can feel a soul screaming yet they know the ripples of overflow in eyes that leak from the drowning inside that moment for warmth has passed by now this soul has already died.
yess...feel the angst. I think I'll go to bed now. sweatdrop
myuubee · Mon Feb 27, 2006 @ 06:38am · 5 Comments |
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I write journal entries like a woman posessed.... stare Anyways...looking forward to valentines day because I must visit my harem and send my love across the land to all! HAHA.... biggrin ooo! I plan to make a tsubasa music video for anime north! Everyone look out for it! I swear I'll get it done in time!!! This will be the 4th official video I've made. I try and do one every year for north. North should be great this year, its their tenth aniversary so we're all gonna party! rofl
I'm also planning to write a novel....oooo help me muses.....I have a rough plot outline and about 3 pages so far. It will be a very messed up artistic creation that will probably offend people who hold on to traditional values. Yep, the world ain't ready for it, I'm ahead of my time cool . Right..... stare
And in the midst of all this, my homework load is growing...and moaning...and haunting... eek
Debating whether or not to cut my hair really short....not relevant to the conversation....
I miss everyone still....I wanna come to mayfield on valentines day. Its a shame that everyone is never in the same place, I always end up missing someone....you know...miss university while at highschool....miss highschool while at university.....you just can't have it all. Nope. Not all at once at least. 3nodding
I woke up at 5:30 today and fell asleep on the bus but didn't miss any of my stops and now I feel pretty decent. (Oh the reason is that I have early class on thursday, normally I wake up at 7am) so I'm proud of myself....in a way. pirate
enough boring tales!
I have pocky!!! Yay! And (unrelated) york had a multicultural food fest + cultural dances yeasterday, Sonya choking on that strange smelling food from turkey....I was amused. (and slightly concerned) blaugh But the rest of the food was edible. 3nodding
and thats that. heart
myuubee · Thu Feb 02, 2006 @ 03:13pm · 2 Comments |
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