So this is Part 1 of a REALLY STUPID AND PROBABLY HIGHLY INAPPROPRIATE series that my friends and I wrote. It's about a girl named Girl and a merboy named Andrew and their adventures in the underwater city of SeaWorld.
Part 1 – Once upon a time. . .THEY RAPED ANDREW>>>>>>>>>>> Once upon a time there was this girl named Girl. She liked to talk to Cleverbot. Cleverbot once told her to never walk through doorways-- you must always run through them. But Girl didn't listen to Cleverbot and continued to walk through all the doorways she came across. So one day she came to a doorway and instead of running she walked through, which then caused her to promptly pass out. A merboy by the name of Andrew saw her and poked her in the face many times then left her where she was. She should have listened to Cleverbot she decided as she woke up to see Andrew flopping away, back to the ocean. Girl wondered what it was like to live under the ocean so she scurried after Andrew, intent on following him to SeaWorld. Andrew, starting to get freaked out by the fact that there was a strange girl following him, eventually turned around to confront her. “Why are you following me?” He demanded to know, “Are you trying to steal my fruit loops?” “Of course!” replied Girl, “but I also want to travel to the ocean and live underwater!” “How did you find out about SeaWorld?! It was supposed to stay a secret forever!” “There's a note proclaiming its existence in your box of fruit loops. You should really keep those somewhere else, you know.” Girl explained. “Oh, well then.” Andrew looked thoughtful for a moment. “YOU DID STEAL MY FRUIT LOOPS!” “OF COURSE I DID!” Girl yelled. “Did you really expect me to ignore fruit loops? They were calling out to me.” “Calling out to you?” “Yes. They wanted me to steal them. Its their fault not mine.” Andrew decided he had had enough of this strange girl and continued walking deeper into the water around him. But, naturally, Girl followed him, so she too was standing in the ocean water. Andrew let out an irritated growl. “Don't follow me!” But Girl did anyway. Until she remembered that she couldn't breathe underwater and began to drown. Andrew threw her a magical blue tunic. And then she could breathe underwater and everything was good, so, of course, she began to follow Andrew again. Andrew swam all the way to SeaWorld where lots of other merpeople crowded the streets. Girl was not happy about being left by herself but decided to make the best of it by starting a new life in SeaWorld. Girl made her way through the bustling city, always keeping her eye out for Andrew. One day she saw him walking through a doorway and rushed to warn him of the danger of doing such a thing. “What?! You again?!” “Yes.” said Girl, “Don't you know you're never supposed to walk through doorways? That's why I was passed out the first time we met.” “I don't remember.” Andrew stated flatly, “Now then, I'm very busy.” “Really?” Girl asked curiously. “With what?” “With. .uh. .” Andrew paused. “I have to go save people from werewolves and rape zombies.” “Why would you want to rape a zombie? That's just plain rude.” Girl reprimanded. “I get bored.” “But zombies aren't smart enough to defend themselves – they don't have brains – that's why they're constantly asking for ours. Gorape a fairy or an elf or something – you have to at least make it fair.” Girl suggested. “ Fine! But they're so hard to find.” “Well then maybe you just shouldn't rape things.” Girl pointed out. “Ganondorf started it.” “Well then maybe you should just rape him.” “But he's bigger than me.” “Then give him drugs to knock him out.” “He also scares me.” “That's because he raped you. If you rape him back, then he'll be scared of you instead.” “I don't think it works that way.” “I think it could work that way.” “Well you're just a fruit loop stealing girl. What do you know?” “Oh I steal much more than fruit loops.” “. . .” Girl smiled, feeling that she had now won forever. THE END No one was left bleeding in the street.
ArinaKira · Thu May 17, 2012 @ 10:27pm · 0 Comments |