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 Posted: Mon Aug 16, 2010 7:45 pm
Larfleeze vs. Daniel Ketch:
Let me tell you how it will be
There's one for you, nineteen for me
James A. Larfleeze loves his job.
Cuz I'm the Taxman
Yeaaah, I'm the Taxman
No, he's not technically a Taxman. He just really likes the sentiment of the song.
He's in collections.
Larfleeze looks at his repo list today and inspects the first name.
"Daniel Ketch. Three months delinquent on payment for his Harley Davidson motorcycle. Heh."
Clearing away a strand of drool from his lips, Larfleeze stops his car in front of Danny's house and clenches a fist.
This is no ordinary repo man. And this will be no ordinary repo. If Danny's not careful, he's going to lose it all.
A glow of orange surrounds the smartly suit-clad alien as he knocks on the door, and perhaps he should have finished reading the description of why exactly they needed to hire Agent Orange Repossessions for this case...
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Posted: Tue Aug 17, 2010 8:12 pm
*Danny didn't know anything about any payments. He'd made a stange deal with a funny little man to get his motorcycle. And while he didn't fully read the contract, there was a lot of talk about punishment and souls. He wasn't sure exactly what the deal was, but he knew he hadn't had to sell his own soul.*
*Of course, the problem was that as the Ghost Rider (part and parcel in the deal was that he accept this alter ego) had a policy against killing even the most vile human scum. So . . . yeah. There's the failure to pay. No vile souls were going to the dark lord in a lawyer suit.*
*In any case! When Larfleeze landed outside, Dan got this really weird feeling that things were going to go bad . . . just when he needed it most. He started outside, and stared at thee glowing alien . . . *
Who the hell are you, dude?
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Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 7:35 am
James A. Larfleeze, a representative - agent, if you will - of Orange. We are the largest debt reconciliation concern in the universe. It appears you have chosen against paying for a vehicle provided to you in...
*Larfleeze gives the contract a once-over and grins*
...Good faith.
*Folding the contract and stuffing it into his suit pocket, Larfleeze tents his fingers, a glint in his eye*
Thus, we have no choice but to collect on your debt. If you'll please step aside...
*Two ghostly Agents of Orange float out of a shiny ring on his finger and toward the motorcycle*
It's time for me to get what's MINE!
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Posted: Wed Aug 18, 2010 6:44 pm
Hey, whoa! To get my bike, I have to dispense vengeance . . . I've been dispensing vengeance right and ******** left!
*He paused, then aimed a shotgun at the orange "ghosts." As a matter of fact, if you don't step away from my bike, I'll dispense some vengeance right here, right now!
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Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 12:22 am
Oh, no... that won't do....
*Several ghostly orange hands reach forth from his own, rapidly dismantling the gun and inserting each piece into one of Larfleeze's many suit pockets*
...That won't do at all. As you can see, petty threats will get you nowhere Mr. Ketch. Whatever Orange wants, Orange gets.
*The ghostly collections agents lift the bike and begin hauling it toward Larfleeze's waiting vehicle.*
Thus, I suggest you step aside and let me take care of business quickly. I have a number of other calls to make today, and it would be a great inconvenience for me to have to do what I just did to your gun... to you.
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Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 6:50 am
*The gas cap on the bike begins to glow. Danny blinks and then he snarls at Larfleeze.*
You. You MUST have innocent blopod on you, or else that wouldn't happen. Which means that not ONLY am I not giving you my bike . . .
*He paused and ran for his vehicle shoving past the hands to touch the gas cap . . . Transforming himself into his skeletal alter ego. Not knowing what the Hell Daniel was saying, however, the Rider does not finish the threat with something clever or witty Instead, he rumbles at Larfleeze.*
VENGEANCE!
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Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 5:00 pm
*With a yawn, Mr. Larfleeze frowns at a speck of ash on his wingtips before turning a pair of utterly bored eyes toward the flaming skeletal biker before him*
Oh no, a flaming skeleton of vengeance. I certainly haven't seen THAT before. Fortunately, your ability to rend the flesh from your body and set yourself on fire hasn't hampered my colleagues' ability to transfer your vehicle into my much larger vehicle.
*the ghostly employees load the bike into Mr. Larfleeze's waiting truck while he finishes some perfunctory paperwork*
Just dotting the i's and crossing the t's, you know. You won't be receiving a copy, of course, you owe us enough already. Now...
*Mr. Larfleeze conjures a ghostly orange calculator, punching in a few numbers as he nods enthusiastically, drool pooling in the corners of his mouth*
...The vehicle naturally covers only a small portion of your debt. It appears that in order to satisfy The Orange, I am also going to require your head. Although, in its current skeletal state, the devaluation may be such that I additionally require a limb or two. I assume you'll allow me to take them willingly. It IS the smart thing to do.
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Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 6:45 pm
*The Rider stepped away from the vehicle holding the bike. Sure, that was a priority . . . he couldn't let this drooling bastad take off with his bike. Not as long as it had the amulet linked to it . . . but the creature had threatened him.*
If you wish to claim my hea, you will have to work for it. *He gripped the chain that wrapped around his chest, and pulled it off. He slung one end towards his enemy's face.*
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The Phantom of Kapow Crew
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Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 6:57 pm
 SHARP DRESSED MEN! All right! 10 points!
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Posted: Fri Aug 20, 2010 3:24 pm
*Mr. Larfleeze decides to gauge the impact of the chain by allowing it to strike the side of his face. The resulting gash, speedily repaired by a network of orange light tendrils, speaks to a power level he is unaccustomed to facing in his day-to-day work. He exhales, an unintentional snort, and straightens his suit. Leveling his gaze upon the deadbeat before him, Mr. Larfleeze idly shines his oversized orange ring with his thumb before producing a flurry of chains, all manner of shape and size*
You're not the first client to be difficult, Mr. Ketch. Certainly not the first to arm themselves in such a pedestrian manner.
*The swarm of chains slowly begins to come to life, each chain writhing itself free from the others, a ghostly orange figure materializing at the end of each one, wielding the chains in their own unique fashion*
Perhaps it would be beneficial for you to meet a handful of those who have tried to follow the path of delinquency.
*The ghostly figures tense, then fling their chains in Ketch's direction, as Mr. Larfleeze stands in the center of the storm, unflinching.*
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Posted: Tue Aug 24, 2010 8:08 pm
::Time Limit Expired::
::Scenario Terminated::
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