ʂɦσɾȶ ☆۰☼۰☆ ʂȶσɾɩҽϩ
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ℱate's ~.❁.~ ℭontract
I'd never considered by existence before.
It just wasn't something a twelve year old girl is often asked to consider. It's a topic that you'd think had an obvious answer, but the more you stared at it the more complicated it became. It was that sort of topic that I'd been faced with, interrupting an otherwise normal and relaxing evening on the balcony of our little house.
"What do you mean? What sort of price is that?" I asked, leaning against the railing and nibbling at my watermelon. It was just a normal summer evening. My parents were asleep by now and Masume was off watching court drama, so it was just me and that thing on the balcony.
Excuse me. By "that thing" I naturally mean "Ku-kun", our magical guardian. When Masume and I first started magic we got this thing, a glowing white puffball that looks like it came out of a pillow. He's more of our adviser than a guardian, though, and good for conversation. We often talked about magic here on the balcony, just him and I, since I loved to learn about getting stronger.
Which we were doing tonight, as usual. But tonight's topic was a bit different.
"It's the price. Right now you're only sampling magic, Satou-chan. But if you pay the price, you can really start training." The cottonball explained to me. I half-listened, half-ate. I really was interested in getting stronger, so don't doubt me there. Magic was amazingly useful. And ever since I started magic I had finally had something I was good at. Ever since moving to Japan I've really been nothing but a failure. I'm an English girl and apparently it doesn't just show in my language skills; my manners, my attitude, my voice, my accent... It shows everywhere. And my parents are always scolding me.
. . . . . .
I embarrass them.
. . . . . .
I use the wrong pronouns.
I don't speak formally enough.
I can't pronounce things.
I don't act right.
Everything is wrong.
On top of that, my studies are going terribly. I can't read my textbooks and can't understand my teachers. My math, science, history, and of course, Japanese classes are going terribly. I'm an idiot. An idiot foreigner.
. . . . . .
And it embarrasses mom and dad.
. . . . . .
No matter how hard I try to impress them.
. . . . . .
I'll never be anything but embarrassing.
I see and shake my head, then wipe some watermelon juice from my cheek with my sleeve before turning up to Ku-kun again.
"Sorry, but what were we talking about?" Ku-kun looks annoyed to hear me say that. I know what you're thinking. "How can a cottonball look annoyed?". But sometimes he scrunches up funny. I think that would be like an angry face for him.
If I do have one talent, apparently I'm good at reading emotions.
"I was telling you that you're really only on a trial period of magic right now. It's like a sample without all of the benefits. And you've gotten as good as you can get on the trial. You can't progress until you pay for the upgrade." Oh right, he had said something about that earlier, hadn't he?
I lean on the railing and spit a watermelon seed at the ground. Not very lady like, I know, but it's fun. As long as mom and dad don't see, and no one tells them, I can be myself for a while.
"mm... I know. But I don't need any more magic, right? I'm happy this way. Masume and I are having a lot of fun but I don't wanna pay a shifty price like 'existence' to get stronger." I explain with a shrug. Because really, it is just a game. I can't tell my parents about how good I am at magic, or even the kids at school. It's not like Masume's math grades, which she can brag about and get rewarded for. I don't get head pats, hugs, rewards, or praise for this.
I don't get those things for anything anymore.
"Oh? But you have such potential." Ku-kun sounds a bit upset. I guess it's like when your softball coach trains you hard and then you don't want to continue the sport in high school or college. They feel like they wasted their time getting you so good. So in that respect, I guess I feel bad for wasting Ku-kun's time.
"Thanks, but I'm still not interested. Masume and I are closer now, so I thank you for that... And I'm happy to have fun trying spells. But this isn't a hobby I want to pay for." I'm done my watermelon. There's just a bush below me, so I drop the remains. Who cares. It'll compost, right? I lick the sticky sweet juice off of my fingers as Ku-kun continues to pitch the upgrade to me, but I'm seriously not interested.
"Your sister might die."
I stop licking my fingers and turn to face him. Did I just hear that right?