Over the course of the past five days, I have had a collective total of eleven hours of sleep. No one is able to fathom the difficulty of waking up this morning. But, being the academically-addicted girl that I am, I forced myself to attend one more day of school before the weekend. Oh, and the SATs are tomorrow morning. Oh joy. Anyways, this weekend involves the reading of not one- but three books. The Scarlet Letter, Fareinheit 451, and Catch-22. Again, oh joy. But, I guess it is time to introduce some of the main characters in the story of my life. I will be mentioning my friends often in these chronicles. I will continually add more of these as I see fit. I might write one or two. A note, these are not really characters. They are real people. Sorry, but I cannot really change them.
First off is the most important. Lindsey:
Name: Lindsey
Year: Junior
Relationship: Best Friend
Status: Alienated
With that said, Lindsey is that stated above- my best friend. Sinse second grade, to be honestl. I cannot think of a time when we have not done everything together. Until recently, I saw her everyday. Every Tuesday we would spend the entire day together. That was until the very end of freshman year. On Tuesday, May 17, 2005, Lindsey decided to run away from her mother's house to live with her dad. It was beyond heartbreaking for me, made none the better by the fact that I she left after spending all day and night with me. I was destroyed inside. She was to go to another school.
For a long time, it seemed like the only true friendship I ever had was failing me. Over time, wounds have not healed, but I have learned to cope with the pain. This incident changed my personality quite a bit. My other 'friends' were afraid for me. I was cold, distant, and harsh. I still am, but keep it under control.
Now, I stop everything if I get a call from Lindsey. If I have plans, but she calls me spur-of-the-moment, I do not care if I have a freaking date with Prince William, I am dumping him for whatever whim Lindsey might have. I sort of feel like a divorced parent who does not see her child for extended periods of time. I always find myself buying things that she might like, and planning what we could do near her father's house.
One thing is for sure, I am not giving up. But I cannot entirely say the same for her.
Betrayal aside, whenever I mention Lindsey in future journals, it will be pure love and affection that binds true best friends forever. Her mother once said that we could go to a trailer park together and have more fun than if either of us went to Disneyworld with anyone else. It is very, very true.
