How my immaturity amazes me. Not only have I lost a man who might have been the love in my life, except I threw away the chance, but I've now pushed him away as a friend. It was immature, I say it again. But it just hurts too much to see him with her. Every time I read their loving notes, my heart just hurts. I'm jealous, is what it is. I can't stand to see them happy, and that makes me hate them and myself. So I'm just going to stop associating with them, and try to hang on to the happier times. I wish I weren't so stupid. And I hope I can find someone else to hold on to...except I'm too much of a jerk. Sorry, I thought I'd already told you...but you didn't believe me, did you.
I figure I'll be happier, and you'll be happier, if I just stay away. But it's mostly about my happiness. Selfish, no?
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An Utterly Inane Diary Full of Indecent References to Your Shoe-Size.
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