I think this whole reunion with my dad is great, but at the same time I have all these questions, and the only people that can answer them have fled town and gone who knows where. On one hand I hope I never hear from them again, and on the other I want to stick them in some cold interrogation chamber and torture them until they tell me the truth. It makes me sick to think about how many of their lies I repeated to people having believed them to be true. To this day if someone accuses me of lieing I flip out. If I catch myself telling even a small lie I'll go back and correct it right away. I got called a liar for the better part of the first 17 years of my life, and it turns out I was the one being lied to. I positively hate them for that, and as much as I know that's wrong I still feel that way.
Until I deal with that hatred and move past it it's going to keep me from doing the things I really want to do with my life.
On a lighter note, my 'friend' forced me to go to a club with her last night. It was annoyingly loud and there were hoochie-mamas as far as the eye could see, so it's a surprise I got hit on by a guy, of whom was 39 y/o. He was funny and such, but I kept thinking about being back home and wanting to talk to someone else. Anyways we left around 2am and straight to bed I went, I'm sick again now, so I slepth half the afternoon away, and will be going back to bed again in a few so I should be well rested by tomorrow, but I'm skipping going back that church. I can't believe how bad the hypocrits have gotten there. It makes me sick to think our preacher felt he had to ask permission to hire someone non-white in this day and age. On top of that he gets the permission and because it was such a narrow margin between the votes he put in his resignation. As if that's not enough the 'elders' decided that no he shouldn't just be able to quit, because that would make the church look bad, heaven forbid, so they want to decline his resignation so they can fire him. WTFHBMF is that s**t? I don't know anyone there that well anymore anyways, I'll probably stop going to church for a while period.
Divorce status is : Waiting for the papers, my signing hand is already practicing. domokun If he doesn't hurry up and get them I'll get my friend to pick them up for me. I hate this waiting. gonk
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ShadowedExistance Community Member 
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[Hanzel]
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Captain Booty. Community Member 
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Its good that you correct yourself when you do. Yeah I can understand how you want them in a *squints* cold interrogation chamber. I never had many friends to even have bad stories to tell about. Maybe getting things strait might do some good. But with people like that it could take awhile to even want to just talk over the phone.
A club? XD I always thought the ones I've been to were actually alittle quiet. I mean, how can you even get up and dance like an idiot without that kind of good music. So more or less its like a wedding reception. But some people do hate the racket. Heh hoochie.. Haven't heard that in awhile. Church. Thats weird that it sounds like its going down. Yeah it would be kinda best to not go even though that is a bad thing. (goes amost every sunday dressed like its a funeral or wedding)
Glad to hear that its going um... Slowly.