Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

damn it! once again, the world has turned on me and stabed me in the back, for the first time in a long time i acctually felt like someone cared. but it was all a lie. i f'ing got used, played with, like a cat does with a dead mouse! obviusly i was previously right, i am here to be used! you hear that world? i am now here for your amusment, just like a toy. play with me till your bored and drop me! i just start to trust people again and i get hurt! i was pissed at a freind and i sent a bad pm, i felt bad so i went onto their account (( ninja )) to delete the pm. well my optic mouse slipped and i clicked the wrong pm. well it turns out that two people i thought really cared about me were just using me, cuz it was obvious by the pm that they were messing around. its going to be another night i cry myself to sleep. obviously no one will notice the tears i shed. i feel so dumb, each day i think of suicide more and more. i think that my choices are to die or at least go back to my emotionless state where i am incapable of loving, that used to keep me content, that way i didnt feel the pain. i know now that i should have never given anyone a second chance.