Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

But through it all I remained sober. I knew getting drunk wouldnt make me feel better anyways. So, right before im about to go to the bar with Dark, and Buss I get a message from my brother on AIM. He got beaten up by my mothers boyfriend. Bob (The boyfriend) apparently grabbed him, turned him around and was like "Fight me!" then slammed him face first into the stairs. Shook my brother up pretty bad, which is saying alot because he's taller than I am and doesnt take s**t. I guess somewhere along the lines I just learned to fight back. Anyways, he ran off to my dads house. Bob apparently wanted to fight my dad too. All of this has put a major dampner on my evening. I mean, how can I stay happy when I know that my brothers and Mother (who is still in the house at this moment with Bob) are in danger. So, I took Buss and Dark out to the bar, we managed to have a good time reguardless. But now that im back home Im thinking about it again. The worst thing in the world is knowing about a problem, then realizing that you can do a damn thing to stop it or help. Someday I'll find a way to help the entire world with everything. I swear it. All the pain and ******** up people in the world need to stop. My family is messed up enough without being beaten and scared to death. Bob is very lucky im not home or within driving distance. I wont lie. I would have killed the ********. And thats a promise. I have several guns, all of which im accurate with, and several knives. Trust me, its dark out. And I know my old neihborhood well enough to stick someone and escape before they knew what happened. ******** with my family... stressed

Enough about that. I suppose that my one major button in life is to hurt my family. Granted, I cant stand most of them... but its my brothers man. Dan, and Shawn are the onlys ones in life I can relate to! They know everything I do, they have the same past, the same drunken parents who ******** beat them and left the scars we carry. My sister too. I'd give my LIFE to stop any of them from experiencing another MOMENT of torture in that house. My only hope now is that my father is wise enough to sheild them from my mother and her boyfriend Bob. Otherwise, I fear for their lives. And Bobs. evil

Jesus, maybe I should have gotten drunk. Crawl back into the bottle for another few weeks. Seems like everytime I poke my head out and have a little hope... someone just spits right in my ******** eye. "Hey Jodo! Hows It going? -SPAT-" Thanks. Im great and you? Put on the happy face ********. We're going on a ride.