So, I think this girl I've been kind of thinking about is dating one of my good friends. After she had been flirting with me for 2 weeks. Ah well, I guess thats my luck. Besides, they wont last. I give it 2 weeks. If that before she comes cruying to me. And guess what? I wont be there to hold her again and tell her its alright. Im not going to watch the tears fall and break my heart all over again. I wont do it!!!
Besides, she wouldnt do it for me. I doubt anyone would. So, I shall ignore her until she goes away. Worked with the others. It'll work this time too.
But, back to work. Which is boring. I should go smoke again just to pass the time. But my lungs are in protest. After last night and smoking out of the Huka for 3 hours (and subsequently re-living all of my pot-head days in my head) my body cant handle it. I've reached my limit from all the booze, the smoking, and lack of sleep. Its time for a crash I think. Ugh, when I breath... I still taste Grape tobacco.
Olivia has been driving me nuts. She is kind of like my sister, and cousin Sue all rolled into one. Its very weird and makes me think about my family a lot. My brother wants to join either the Navy, or Coast Guard. His heart is set on being a puddle pirate just like his brother. Im glad im a rolemodle of some sort, and that he cant see me when im down and out like this. Shawn is suspended from school again. Fought his principle. Got him good in the face from what I hear. Makes me proud, though I 'played' the adult and told him he was wrong over the phone. He's smoking a load of pot, and drinking to.
Shawn is like all of my negative parts, and Dan is the positive ones. Which explains why they clash all the time and want to kill each other 90% of the time. But, as brothers they never take it that far. Just black eyes and broken bones. And somehow, I got a combination of ALL that.
As for my sister, who knows. Shes only my half sister in reality, but I still love her. Skylar too. God I miss her. I love her like my own, I really do. Makes me wish I could be a father someday with a kid like that.
But, Im alone. And thats not really a fesable goal for me anymore. Its like all my other dreams, which are just that. Dreams.
What a shitty day. mad
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Edit: LOL. ******** Jack Thompson.
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