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For some reason, I always imagined it differently.
I guess I'm just angry about life not working out how I planned. I know, its stupid. Life has been hard for me on this end. Dealing with my family. It takes a lot out of me. I constantly have to fix all the damage thats been done between family members. My brother steals, lies, drinks, and does drugs. My mother is an alcoholic, and an abusive one at that. Drinks and drives, and always has to be angry about something. Drama queen. My father doesnt have the ability that I do to clean up the after effects of this hell, and is too old and slow to try. He cant keep up with this tornado of a family. Dan is away thank god. Least he doesnt have to deal with all this stuff. I visted my grandmother grave. I havent cried in four years. So, it was the first in a while. I stayed there for maybe 20 minutes before I had to leave. Couldnt take it.

Life is grand. I know I'm depressed again, and I blame my family entirely. All I want to do is drink, and sleep. Which I cant do.

Gaia wasnt a good idea today apparently.

I've really stopped giving a s**t I guess. Oh well. To quote the other half of the Hate Machine: "******** em if they can't take a joke."

Edit: Just cause I'm a p***k. And I thought it was funny that this song came on while I was typing:

"Had Enough"

Milk it for all it's worth.
Make sure you get there first.
The apple of your eye.
The rotten core inside.
We are the prisoners.
Things couldn't get much worse.
I've had it up to here, you know your end is near.

[Chorus:]
You had to have it all,
Well have you had enough?
You greedy little b*****d,
You will get what you deserve.
When all is said and done,
I will be the one to leave you in the misery and hate what you've become.

Intoxicated eyes, no longer live that life.
You should have learned by now, I'll burn this whole world down.
I need some peace of mind, no fear of what's behind.
You think you've won this fight, you've only lost your mind.

[Chorus:]
You had to have it all,
Well have you had enough?
You greedy little b*****d,
You will get what you deserve.
When all is said and done,
I will be the one to leave you in the misery and hate what you've become.

Hold me down (I will live again)
Hold me down (I will break it in)
Hold me down (better in the end)
Hold me down.

[Chorus]
You had to have it all,
Well have you had enough?
You greedy little b*****d,
You will get what you deserve.
When all is said and done,
I will be the one to leave you in the misery and hate what you've become.

Heaven help you.






User Comments: [1] [add]
CyKa
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Thu Nov 09, 2006 @ 06:52am
I love my family, but I have to admit, being thousands of miles away can be a blessing at times sad heart *huggles*


User Comments: [1] [add]
 
 
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